After a month of reviewing big budget sequels starring some of our favorite actors, we at Your Stupid Minds decided to scale back to a nice zero-budget drama written, directed, and starring one of our favorite auteurs. Yes, we return to Neil Breen, the writer/director/producer/star/visionary behind Fateful Findings, one of our favorite movies of last year (yes, we know it technically came out in 2013). This time, it’s I Am Here.... Now, a morality play about a godlike alien being as he hassles a handful of drug dealers and corrupt politicians as he decides whether the human race should be eradicated. He also befriends an old man with cancer and a young environmental activist/escort. Will Neil Breen and his weird robot body and zombie face kill us all? There’s only one way to find out!
Some Notes:
- Every actress in this film appears to be wearing the same uniform: denim skirt, buttoned shirt with spaghetti straps, no bra.
- Breen clearly forces his actors to stick to the script as written, forcing them to deliver lines like “Cancer-Chemo kicked my ass” without even a hint of irony.
- When “The Being” first says he’s “disappointed in our species,” he appears to be looking at a skull and a spider on the ground. He clarifies, “the human species,” so I guess spiders are doing an okay job.
- Every scene appears to take place between 11 a.m. and 3 p.m., making it impossible to tell how much time passes in this story. Is it a crazy weekend or months?
- If you go to 36:22 as suggested, it begins at a pool with the topless "twins," followed by a shot of a clay lawn decoration, then back to the topless women.
- The film is currently not available for sale, which is a shame, because we want to pay money for it.
